Uniquely Handmade by God

on Tuesday, March 1, 2011 at 12:30pm

I know that God loves us.  I know that He made us.  I know that God chose our lives for us.  But do I really know what that means.  I swear He teaches me more everyday.  Takes me closer to His ideal me. But God didn't just choose us, He knew the where, what, when, why, who and how that was needed to make us.  I am always in awe at how perfectly he set up my life so I would be me.  I guess the first thing I had to accept was that I was me and I couldn't be anyone else.  Not what my mom wanted, what my brother and dad needed, not even what I thought I should be.  God took direction and producing right right away.  From the time I was very small He talked to me, spoke truth to me.  It is so hard in fallen world to take what you dream about and figure out if it could be real.  But God shaped me from the beginning and my dreams were so personal so amazingly vivid I knew they were real.  But then I started having nightmares and had my parents especially my mom saying they are just dreams.  The coolest part was when I started to read (I would sneak into mom and dads room and get dads bible and read it in my closet so mom wouldn't find me.)  I found that what He said in my dreams He said in the word.  He was never inconsistent.  Which was amazing to me because everything at that time was inconsistent.  There was not continuity. No idea when the next beating would come or not come. No idea what would set my mother off.   My only truths became the fact that what I had been told in my dreams were exactly what was said in this amazing book. Well almost. In my dreams He didn't use thee and thous ect.  Once I found out that that was just fancy for you and the you could ignore the th at the end of some words I was on my way.  I would puzzle through some passage and use the dictionary for others and that is how I started studying the bible.  I was 4 or 5 and I was in God's word while hiding in a closet with a pink pin light, a stuffed white kitty, a pillow and a blanket and I was in love with reading and talking to God.  That was how God started making me.  From the womb He designed me.  I do wonder does God talk to all children and then we tell them it's their imagination or it was just a dream, mostly I know with the best intentions but when we do this are taking God away from them.  I have learned to have children tell me about their dreams and work through them.  But then they need the vocabulary to do that so what's the answer.  Prayer always works best.  Nothing is perfect not this side of Heaven but knowing what's in you child's head is really important.  We are so uniquely made.  Many have gone through the same things and turned out so differently and many have had such different lives and turned out so close to the same.  Everything we go through, every choice we make, every person in our lives all these things God puts there to shape who we are and what He wants us to become.  So many need our witness but we can't witness if we are so hung up on what happened to us that we can't get past it to get to the why this happened and what it has done in my life that will help others.  I wonder sometimes if I am holding back to much, if I am doing this or that wrong.  I spend so much time analyzing everything single thing I do that I sometimes forget that I need to be sharing it. Not the oh feel sorry for me or wow look how great I am. No never that.  The things to share are more.  wow God gave me this in my life so I can do that and He blessed me with this so I can show others a part of who He is.  The things we do the places we are are all about what God needs us to do next.  We are on a Missionary Journey for God all of us. Some of us get to go to foreign lands or even different states and some of us never leave our home towns. But all of us have a purpose in God's plan and all of us are to help each other and work with each other so the body can function to its maximum ability.  There is nothing more beautiful than a body of Christ who's members are so in touch with God that they function almost without communication.  Communication is key of course. But I have seen sickness hit one person and another person walk in when needed and supply the skill that the sick person had.  It is amazing to watch God work isn't it.